Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
