There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
