he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
