Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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