The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
