he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Randomize