TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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