cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
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