Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
How's work?
Spinning.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
