this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
