Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Randomize