I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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