I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Randomize
