How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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