If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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