Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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