Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
