well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
