Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
