it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
You were trust falling into bushes
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
