I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
