North Korea, Best Korea!
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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