At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I just gargled with NyQuil
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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