You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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