on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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