So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I am available for nakedness
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize
