worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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