playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize