I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
Randomize
