i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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