So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
