Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
