In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
