every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
