Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
