You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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