So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Randomize
