i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize