Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
