after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
