He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
