so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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