using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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