I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
In other news, just had to pluck an ingrown pub with the pliers from my multi tool while sitting on the toilet at work.
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