How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize
