I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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