Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
