Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
You pole danced in your parka.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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