So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
and she was petting her beer can
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
