This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
