You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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