If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
We have started to decorate penises.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
